03.03.11

March 3, 2011

These past couple months have been the pits. Trying to keep my head above water. Everywhere I go, Everything I see, babies, babies, babies. It drives me crazy. I feel emotionally & physically numb. I've gained 40lbs in the past two months. Basically all of the weight that I'd lost last year, I put on in two months. I guess that's what you get for laying in bed, and on the couch all day long. I haven't been eating anymore then I usually do, just stopped doing everything. Ignoring friends, & family. Putting on a front everytime I'm forced to see them.. Acting like everything is A okay, when it's not. I feel sorry for Chris having to put up with me. He seems to be better off than I am mentally with all of this, but I think it's harder for the Moms because we feel everything physically, and the men don't have that physical connection. We will see how things go, I really hope things get better.